


Try

by Huntress_WomenSpirit



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15x19 fix-it-fic, Fix-It, Idiots in Love, It starts real queerbaity but bear with me its worth it, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:27:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27560728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress_WomenSpirit/pseuds/Huntress_WomenSpirit
Summary: Dean asks Jack to bring Cas back from the Empty... and they talk.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 33
Kudos: 257





	Try

**Author's Note:**

> After watching 15x19, I felt this is the only way it could make sense and still be destiel. I hope someone enjoys it. At least it´s brought me happiness to write it ^^ It really starts like the show, a bit queerbaity and confusing but bear with me, good things are coming- a little bit of angst is needed in everything xD
> 
> This was all inspired by the cornfield picture- the one of Cas in a cornfield that much of the fandom has seen but none remembers to have seen in an episode ever. That last straw of hope that we cling to, thinking it´s proof that Cas will be back xD
> 
> Update: holly crap, everyone ^^ Thanks so, so much to everyone saying Dean is so realistic. I usually struggle writing Dean, but I think that this time I could get a bit into his head :) I love a fluffy Dean, always, but I dont feel hes super realistic. If you like that style, you might like Dreams of Perdition, that Dean is pretty similar to this one ^^ Thanks again for the kudos and comments, youve made me very happy!!

Dean licked his lower lip to immediately trap it between his teeth, nervous. He had his hands on his pockets, his gaze on the asphalt, and was leaning against the side of the Impala. It was a sunny day, and he was in the middle of nowhere.

 _Come on, Winchester, no chickening out now_ , he thought.

He had talked to Sammy before leaving, about what he was gonna ask. His brother had immediately stood, walking to get his stuff as he mentioned something about it _being about time_ and not understanding _the days of delay_ … But he had stopped him right on his tracks.

“Look, I… I wanna go alone. I´m sorry, Sammy. I know he´s important to you too. And I can´t explain you why. I just… I need you to trust me on this”

His brother had turned sad and confused eyes to him.

“I… will bring him home if, if he wants to come”, he added, “If not… I´m sure he will find a way to meet you and say hi or whatever”

“Why… wouldn’t he want to come back?”, Sam blinked confusedly at him.

Dean had just looked away. There was no easy answer. So he gave none.

“Dean… what happened between you two?”

He avoided his brother´s intense gaze and just… started walking up the stairs of the bunker. Sammy had followed him with his worried eyes all the way up, before telling him to be careful out there. He had left with a hand wave as his only goodbye.

And there he was, by the road. He could have done this anywhere, he supposed… but he had just drove and drove until the knot of nerves on his guts seemed to ease. Though it had come back with a vengeance as he had left the car, so all the _healing drive_ idea had been just plain stupid.

He had been thinking about this for days. Even when he tried to flee from the discomfort it all caused him, by drinking, by paying all the attention he could to some dumb TV show or whatever, it had constantly been in the back of his mind.

But it was about time. This was not only about him. He had been down there long enough. Whatever happened between them, he deserved to be out, or at least he thought so- and he hoped that the higher powers that be agreed with him.

Good thing he had a good relationship with The Man himself.

“Jack?”, Dean asked in the sky´s general direction, “I… You said you´d be in every raindrop or whatever, so… I guess you´re here, somewhere. I… I´d like to ask you a favor”

He didn´t know what to expect. The kid had been adamant about that he would not be available for beers or chats or whatever. Would he show? Or what was he supposed to do, talk to himself and hoped he´d listen? This was a new God, all about two days old- and he had no previous experience at all on praying to him. He´d never been a big prayer, anyway. He took a deep breath and sighed.

“Look, I… I know what you said, about not intervening. Hands off the world- and man, that’s fan-freaking-tastic. Really happy about that. We got more than enough meddling till now. But… This is probably against all that…”

The words stilled in his chest for a second, he gulped nervously.

“We´ve lost a lot of people along the way, and… I know we can´t get them all back. It would screw all kinds of things up. I see that. But… But he was different. Without him, I would have never survived Death. In a way, that makes him… a part of the victory?”, he knew his reasoning was thin, “Maybe? Like, cause I was a part of it? And it´s not like I´m saying, since Sam and I saved the world again we deserve a medal or some special treatment, but just…”

He stopped, he was just babbling. He would hate to have obsessed so much about what came next if Jack ended up just, not doing his part. 

“He was your father”, he told the sky, a knot on his throat, “Without him, you would have never been born. Damn, Sam and I were eager to gank you. So… I thought that maybe, just maybe, you could… I don´t know. Make an exception?”

One second. Three seconds. Five. Dean´s heart was hitting double time when someone suddenly appeared.

“Hello”

Dean smiled, still nervous though. Jack was wearing the same clothes he had last seen him in. The white jacket suited him, he thought. He was on the other side of the road, and his expression was serene. He felt… so far away from him. Not only cause of the physical distance. There was something about him that was like, unreachable. He realized that had been that what had prevented him or his brother to hug him goodbye two days earlier. It felt like, it didn’t proceed, like it wasn´t what it was supposed to happen. Things were different now.

“Hey, kiddo”, he said, “Glad you came”

“So you´re finally ready”

His smile froze on his face under his loving and compassionate gaze. He gulped and looked down. One of the reasons he had feared Jack wouldn’t cooperate… was, simply, that he had not brought him back himself already. After all, he had his own totally valid reasons for wanting him back, and he had the power.

Now… he got the feeling- no, the certainty, that… he´d known. Jack had _known_. That Dean needed the time to think. That he needed to have some control over this- a bit, at least, for the first fucking time. Even if it was just about the _when_.

He grimaced a bit. He hated feeling small. It was Jack, and he trusted him… but knowing that he knew how he felt and think, just made him feel uneasy. But that would be God for you, right?

“It doesn´t matter if I´m ready or not”, he grumbled, not looking up, “It´s about what´s right. And he shouldn´t be down there”

“It was his choice, you know”, Dean lifted his eyes, fear pinching his heart; while Jack observed the scenery in total peace, as if he could gaze at it for a century, “And it is the nature of things, that angels go into The Empty when their time is due”

“Jack…”, Dean started, ready to beg.

“But maybe you´re right. Maybe…”, his distant gaze turned pensive, “Maybe the two humans that helped the new God be born could get some kind of reward. Just once”

Then Jack shifted his eyes to Dean, smiling slightly… and for a moment, he just looked like the gawky kid he had taught how to drive, how to fish. Dean understood. He wanted to help him, but he wanted to be fair too.

“Just once sounds good and fair to me”, he provided, excitement running through his body.

Jack nodded, and the solemn look returned to him as he stared right into his soul.

“Just once, Dean”, he said seriously, even ominously.

The weight of it all fell over him. Just once. He could die again. Dean himself could. Or Sammy. No more demon deals would work. No more free passes at death. For anyone. Ever. 

He took a deep breath… and nodded. If he had one ticket, he knew perfectly where he would spend it.

He raised him from perdition so long ago. It was high time he repaid the favor. 

“Bring him back”

Jack nodded slowly… and vanished.

In the few next moments… nothing happened. He was alone, in that road surrounded by farmland. His eyes darted from one place to the next, expecting… something, _anything_.

And suddenly he was there. 

There, in… the middle of the cornfield that extended in front of him. There, in his stupid trenchcoat and blue tie.

Cas.

He froze, mouth slowly opening, heart beating crazy time.

His face… was like the sun itself. His blue eyes were locked into him, and he had… that look. The one he had right before The Empty took him away. That… gaze of… deep, deep love, of infinite fondness for him, of devotion and happiness and relief and fulfillment. When their eyes met, the smile of the angel widened, wrinkling the corners of his eyes. Dean huffed out a shaky laugh as his eyes glinted.

“Come´ere, you son of a bitch”, he rasped.

It would have been too low for any human to hear, but he knew Cas could. And that he could come to him. Not like him. He… His legs were locked in place for some reason. He suddenly appeared in front of him, and he was so nervous he even flinched a bit, eyes wide open.

“Cas…”, he whispered.

The eyes of the angel were shining like crazy, and that sent a pang of pain through his whole body… it was just like he had last seen him.

“Hello, Dean”

And _that_ broke something, the spell, the whatever thing that had locked him in place; his face broke into a smile and he advanced a step to hug him. Like so many other times when they had thought they´d lost each other. After Purgatory. After Cas´s death at the hands of Lucifer. When Dean returned after confronting Amara and God.

But this time… it was different. There was something in the way Castiel, just for a moment, melted into his embrace, held him close. In the way his hands pushed deeply and softly into his back. It wasn’t like any hug-tap-tap they had ever shared, and what Dean had honestly gone for as he threw his arms around him. He froze as he felt the change. Maybe… Cas was just, not holding back anymore.

The angel quickly retreated from him, looking down as he pressed his lips.

“I´m sorry. I… don´t want to make you uncomfortable”

This was bad. This was _so bad_. Dean was in shock and he had the same fucking face he had made right before The Empty took him… And Cas had probably felt him stiffen in confusion. He forced himself to stifle out a little laugh, to smile.

“Come on, man. If us hugging after we thought the other was dead was a bad thing, we should have gone to jail long ago”

Castiel looked up and smiled slightly at him.

And there they were, finally reunited, standing in front of each other.

Oh, shoot. _Oh, shoot._ It was time. It was _now_. He cleared his throat, tried to gulp.

“So. H-How much do you know about what happened?”

_Coward..._

“Jack told me everything”, the angel´s smile widened, “I´m so proud of him… and of you two. You defeated Chuck. You did it”, his eyes shone as he said that, as if he was talking about the most amazing feat anyone had ever done.

“Meh. Sammy and I just… got beat up. It was all Jack”

Castiel made a lopsided smile and shook his head.

“What?”, he asked, and Cas sighed.

“Even after defeating the biggest power that´s ever existed, you still believe you didn’t do enough. That is… so you”, he smiled fondly.

He risked a glance into those loving blue eyes. He remembered… all the things he had told him before sacrificing himself. Cas had always seen him from such a different light. He´d always seen the good in him. With such admiration.

It had been devotion, he realized now. It had… who knew for how long?

But yeah, he hadn´t done enough. And he started to feel like shit, so he just took the bull by the horns. He looked down into the asphalt, took his hands to his pockets and he felt himself shrink a little, as if he was trying to retreat into himself.

“Cas… I owe you an apology”, he said with a painful grimace, looking away, “When you said… what you said, I… I just stood there…”

“Dean, no, please”, the angel interrupted him, worry in his eyes, “It´s okay. I never needed reciprocity from you…”

“Shut up. Just… let me speak”, he said without heat, frowning as he glimpsed upwards.

The angel stopped talking, sadness in his eyes. Dean felt like shit. He felt like he was making Cas feel bad about having told him. He didn´t know how to do this right. But he had a speech, and it was the only thing he could hold on to.

So he started again. He could not meet his eyes, dammit. He felt so fucking stupid.

“When you said what you said, I just… stood there, and said nothing, and that _sucked_. That´s gotta have been the worst reaction to…”

He hitched for half a second. It still was unbelievable, what he was going to say. But he would not insult Cas by calling it anything else. If it had made him so happy… it meant it was important to him.

“… t-to a love confession in the history of love confessions”, he said, maybe a tad too quickly, as if he was trying to speed over a bumper road. He had blushed a bit. He took an uneven breath to continue, “I thank you for that. I mean… what you said. About me. It… a part of me felt you were right. I… thought of that as we had Chuck at our mercy. I told him, you know. He called me the perfect killer. I told him…”, he looked up at the angel, “that I wasn´t. I wasn´t that”

Cas gave a small, bittersweet smile.

“And I… am… sorry”, he powered through, his voice shaking a bit, “that… I-I can´t say it back. You deserve…”

“I know, Dean”, Castiel interrupted with the softest, kindest voice he´d ever been addressed with, “I knew. I always knew. And it doesn’t matter. I don’t need it. I really don´t. I never intended to tell you. I wouldn´t ever have, if it hadn´t been necessary to save you. I…”, he doubted for a second, and in front of Dean´s eyes he sighed into relaxation, with a calmed pride and peace the hunter had never seen in him, “I am not sorry about what I feel, or what I said. But I am sorry that hearing it made you feel bad, or uncomfortable, or guilty. Please. Forget it, if that´s what you need”

“Do you _really_ think I´m ever going to be able to forget that?”, he asked, a small shrill in his voice, looking at his friend as if he was crazy.

Castiel frowned, and it seemed that sadness was sinking deeper and deeper into him. Dammit, this was going all kinds of wrong… 

“Like I said, I don’t want you to be uncomfortable", the angel murmured, not looking at him, "I can´t change what I feel, but if you need space…”

“No! Just… Shut up, you…!”, Dean snapped, his nerves making him slip into anger, “You fast assuming bastard!”

Castiel blinked at him, confused.

“You… you assume too much. Too fast. You assumed…”, he complained, and he knew he was not making any sense, but he couldn’t be more coherent than that, he looked up at him intensely, “You never told me”

Cas frowned in distress. That had come out wrong, as an accusation. 

“Dammit!”, Dean swore, his knuckles popping as he balled his fists, “I´m trying dude, I´m trying, but I suck at this. No”, he said promptly, raising a hand as the angel opened his mouth to speak again, “Don´t say anything, please, just… let me think for a second”

Castiel looked worried and guilty, but he nodded. He looked down and took two paces to move and rest his hips on the Impala by his side. And said nothing.

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He wanted, he really wanted to do this _right_ , for him, for Cas; but he was _such an idiot_ and emotions and words were just _not his thing_...

His speech. He had a speech. He had worked on it for days, and for some reason, when he came here he had believed it was a good one. Now he only felt he was such an asshole, that the only thing he could do was hurt Cas more- but he deserved something. After all he´d been through…

“You never told me…”, he said softly, “And… I never thought of it. I just never… saw us in that way. You know?”

He sounded defeated. Well, at least he wasn’t screaming at the one being that had sacrificed for him a thousand times.

“I´ve always… loved you my way, Cas. Like a brother, and that, for me it´s like… top shelve. There´s nothing above it, family. You´re family, and…”

No. That was coming out wrong. He was fleeing again. He cleared his throat.

“I´ve been thinking… Everyone always had those… jokes. Calling us… you know. That you were my boyfriend and that shit”, he thought of Meg, “That you were in love with me”, he thought of Balthazar, “All of those. And… I feel like an idiot, man. Maybe it was always there, and everyone saw it, but… not me. I guess it comes from my dad, you know. He always mocked gays. I did too, for some time. Later I met some people and, I don’t know, I realized it wasn’t that bad. But I never thought anyone close to me… Not that I´m saying there´s something bad”, he interrupted himself quickly, “There´s not. I just, never kept it in mind… as a real possibility. For anyone. Close. You know?”

His heart was hitting so hard onto his chest that it hurt. He was glad that Cas was by his side and he could look forward without seeing him.

“So I never thought of it till now. So w-when I say I can´t say it back, it´s cause I can´t. L-like, now. B-but… I´m not…”

He felt Cas tensing by his side.

“… saying it couldn´t happen someday”, he muttered quickly.

There. He´d said it. He risked a look towards the angel. His back had straightened and his eyes, lost in the cornfield, were getting wide. He was pale. He looked… hopeful and scared at the same time. 

“What?”, he whispered, barely audibly.

“I don´t know!”, he snapped, he was terrified, “I don´t wanna give you false hopes, man, I really don’t, but I just can´t… I can´t…”

He stopped, took another deep breath. Cas was tense as a coil by his side. He didn´t seem to be breathing. Maybe he didn’t need to.

“I can´t help but think about so many things now”, he said, strain on his face, “L-like… The staring, man. You always did that, but no one _forced_ me to stare back, you know? And-and the personal space, and you… were always… I always knew there was something _intense_ going on between us, but I don’t know, I thought it was cause you are an angel, and whatever the _profound bond_ meant… But man, sometimes…”

He gulped at the memory of Cas making a cowboy voice for him. That had been _real weird_. But like... good weird? He still felt squirmy as he thought of it.

“And every time I thought I lost you, I…”

He winced at the pain he had felt when Lucifer had killed him, how he just… didn’t want to keep on living anymore. How bad he had been feeling the past days, even knowing there was a possibility that Cas could come back.

“I don’t know… what´s… what I´m… feeling”, he said slowly, his voice rasping, “I just know… that I can´t… picture my life without you in it”

It was girly, and it was pathetic, and it was true. He risked another glance.

Cas´ eyes were wide open, filled with emotion, with hope, with light, with incredulity.

“And I´m sorry!”, he snapped, “Cause that’s- that´s not what you deserve! You´re frigging awesome, and you deserve someone that… that loves you in that… sure, complete and _absolutely_ devoted and all-filling way that you… love”, he stammered, “Someone that can tell you all kind of pretty, meaningful things like what you said to me, with the certainty of having their fucking heart behind their words. But I´m not there. I´ve got this, weird limbo of what-the-fuck inside my chest, and I don’t know how to fix it. And I´ve tried, man!”, he complained out loud, “I´ve, I´ve spend the past few days going over and over all of this, and all our past, and all I´ve ever felt, and I just… don´t know anything anymore”

His shoulders slumped in defeat.

“But… I didn´t want you to stay rotting in Emptyland. This… is as far as I got”, he lowered his eyes sadly, “You deserve better. Better than me. You deserve everything, and… I can´t give you that”

He licked his lips, bit his lower one.

“But”, he added, grasping his courage, “if… you really… If you´re sure you wanna settle with me. Which is dumb, by the way”, he snorted. He gulped, “Maybe…”

He was finally there. He turned to Cas.

“Maybe we can give this a try. And maybe, someday… I can say it back to you with the same certainty you said it to me”

The angel was… speechless. Wide-eyed, mouth agape, he looked at him as if that was the first time he´d seen him. His eyes were glinting, with illusion but uncertainty, with hope but confusion. Like he didn´t dare believe what was happening. Dean was still tense as a coil, hunching towards himself, looking at him with embarrassed, terrified and _honest_ eyes; uncertainty and guilt making him tense his shoulders up. They must have looked really, really stupid. Somewhere above the clouds, Jack must have been getting some good laughs. 

“Is that… really what you want?”, Castiel muttered, frowning in absolute bewilderment.

Dean took a deep breath and let it out in a sigh, looking towards the road. Jesus, he felt calmer after letting that out. Though his heart was still pounding like crazy. 

“I think… that in this whacky world, if you find something that has the _chance_ to make you happy, you grab it and you don´t let go. We´ve lived some intense lives, and things will probably get better with Jack in charge… but we can still get killed any day, you know?”

He looked back to Cas. Then he frowned embarrassed and looked down, unable to say it to his face.

“And... I don´t want to let you go”

Cas did a little strange noise in his throat at that, and when Dean looked up, he saw that the uncertainty had been replaced by joy, and only surprise was still holding him back. He was starting to smile.

“Really, Cas, I don’t wanna lift your hopes up”, he hurried to say, looking embarrassedly away, “I… There´s something, I… I do feel something, but is it love? Will it be? I´ve got no idea, man", he said shaking his head in a negative fashion, gulping nervously, "And even if it is, this may not work. God knows I´m not the easiest person to have around. Well, you know that well enough by now. I´m an idiot, and I get angry, and I pay it with the people around me”, he frowned and looked at him with a grimace of shame, “You should really find someone better, angel”

Castiel smiled as he laughed slightly.

“It is you who I love, Dean. Just the way you are”

Dean couldn´t help but smile. Now he was quoting love songs to him? Knowing the angel, he probably had no idea Bruno Mars had highly monetized that sentence.

“With your light, and your shadows...”, Castiel continued with that devoted look of his. Then he turned uncertain, “If… this is really how you feel... If it´s what you really want, if you´re sure…”

Dean looked sadly at the angel. The poor thing had probably thought for years that this could never happen. That Dean could not ever love him back… It was probably difficult for him to believe this. Maybe he needed more. And he deserved more. Dean took a deep breath and steeled himself before turning fully to him.

“I want you. I want to try this, Cas”, he said, eyes locking into his, heart pounding, “I… I think we got a pretty good shot at this. I can´t… promise you now we will be together forever but… I _can_ tell you I´m gonna give it my best effort”

Ah, dangit. _His best effort_? What had happened to _I don’t really know what I want_?

“So let´s do this. Let´s… try. If you´ll have me…”

He wanted to kick himself in the nuts. He already knew. Or did he?

Castiel closed his eyes for a second, tension leaving him in a sigh as he smiled slightly to himself in absolute relief, in liberation; and when he opened them up again they teared up as that smile widened from ear to ear, lighting up his face, lighting up the world, and lighting up Dean´s heart into fireworks. 

_Damn right_ he did.

“Of course I´ll have you”, he said in a raspy voice, tears streaking down his face.

“Hey, hey, hey”, Dean complained, taking his face into his hands to wipe his tears with his thumbs, “Don´t cry, now, come on, it´s not gonna be that bad”

Cas started to laugh, and that made just more tears fall.

“Come on, I said I´d try, just give me a chance”, he jokingly continued, chuckling as he tried to catch more tears.

The angel put his hands over his, smiling across his tears; and for a second, everything stilled. Everything stopped. There was only green and blue, and Dean´s beating heart and that stupid _joy_ of seeing Cas happy coursing up and down all over him. A joy that had eased all his pains, and made him feel that the excruciating days of nerves and plans had been all worth it... so worth it. 

Suddenly Dean had recoiled nervously, taking his hands with him, looking away. Was he blushing? Holy fucking crap. And _oh shit_ , he had recoiled from Cas _while he was crying_.

“I-I´m sorry, this is all…”, he started to say, turning back to him again.

“New”, breathed out Cas with that smile of his, apparently unaffected.

“Yeah”, he breathed out smiling a bit as well. 

And they stayed there, sitting against the Impala. For some moments Dean focused only on breathing, his brain finally catching up completely with what just had happened. Had it really happened? He´d said yes!! He couldn´t believe it. It was crazy. He looked sideways at Cas, who seemed to have regained control over the waterworks, and had his eyes closed as he kept the happiest and most thrilled smile he´d ever seen in him. It moved him a little.

And there they were, saying nothing like the two idiots they were.

“So”, he said into the silence, “We have something”

“Something?”, said Cas, turning his head towards him.

“Yeah, let´s not name it for now”, said Dean with a wince.

“Alright”

Dean took some more time to try to calm his stupid heart but… there was a _giddiness_ that was taking over him. With a little side dish of hope. But so much uncertainty. _So_ many questions. And fear he´d fuck it up.

“How do we do it?”, he wondered out loud in absolute confusion.

“How do you want to do it?”, asked Cas.

“I don’t know!”, he answered, his last syllable transforming into a nervous laugh.

They fell silent again. The sun was starting to set.

“Do you want to go back to the bunker?”, he asked tentatively.

“If you want me there…”, Cas smiled.

“I want you there”, he said looking him straight in the eyes.

The angel smiled, and so did he. Maybe he didn’t know exactly where his heart was going, but every certainty he could, he would give it to him.

"We can start there. Then we´ll see"

Cas nodded, and they both got into the car, the doors squeaking as they closed them.

"Does Sam know?", asked Cas curiously, tilting his head that way that it was _so his_. 

"Nope", said Dean with a nervous smile, "Guess we´ll burn that bridge when we get to it..."

Dean took the wheel and stared into the road for a moment. He let out a sigh. He remembered how tense he´d been driving here... It seemed it had passed a year since that. 

“Dean", Cas started saying, fondness on his voice, "I don´t want _ever_ for you to do anything, to say anything… that you don´t want to, that you´re not sure of, of that you are not comfortable with. I´ve had years to come to terms with this. Take your time to figure out what you want, and when you want it. I have waited a long time, and just loving you, and being by your side, it´s more than enough for me. And I will wait as long as it´s needed for us to be sure that you are happy along this new path”

That for some reason lifted some weight from Dean. He felt Cas was like, so much ahead of him in all this feelings thing, and he feared he was gonna have to run to catch up.

“Okay. Thanks, Cas. Right back at´cha”, he gave him half a smile.

The angel gave him the warmest, most loving smile of all time, and his insides squirmed in hope and embarrassment and a tinge of fear.

 _You know you´re gonna fuck this up, Winchester_ , a voice inside him told him.

And he doubted, for a second… But then he looked up into the reddening sky. He might. But he might not. This could work. He felt… he felt they could make this work.

 _This is crazy_ , he thought, _This is so crazy_.

 _What else is new,_ he answered himself, _We´ve done crazier things, and they worked_.

He turned on the engine and adjusted the center mirror in automatic motions… but then he looked to the side. Where his angel- _his angel_ , holy shit- was smiling into the road, into the future, hands resting on the leather seat.

His heart went into overdrive, but some giddy impulse overcame him, and he put his hand on Cas´.

The angel whirled to look at him, surprised… and smiled. Cas moved his hand so it could embrace his… and they stayed like that for a moment. It was stupid. Girly. Hand holding. Holly Hell, what a feat. Chick-flick moment. 

But for a second, feeling that solid touch, that warm caress, Dean felt that… as crazy as things were, this was the most real thing that had happened to him in that whole week.

Then he took his hand away, grabbing the wheel as he hurriedly switched gears and made the car start moving.

“You´re blushing, Dean”, Cas informed. 

“Am not”

“You are cute”, Cas teased, a sentence that heard in his gravelly angelic voice was the weirdest thing ever.

“Shuddup”

And they rode off into the sunset.

**Author's Note:**

> There. I fixed some things xD 
> 
> \- I really wanted this to happen in the cornfield of the image, and I felt that for Dean, driving Baby its relaxing. And he stalls xD So I thought it made sense that he drove into whatever farmlands so the image was “canon” ^^  
> \- As I was watching the episode, my bf said out loud to Sam and Dean "hug him or something!" referring to Jack before he left. I felt that was okay. I felt that Jack was unreachable, but maybe it hadn't been properly explained. So there it is.  
> \- I liked very much the idea of Dean raising Cas from perdition. Full circle. Gaaaahhhhhhh, I wish they do something with that in 15x20.  
> \- Tried to explain Dean´s weird behavior in 15x19, not telling ANYTHING to Sam cause he´s obsessing and over this and feeling embarrassed of his feelings, drinking himself to sleep, and of course- why he didn´t immediately ask Jack to bring Cas back! Hum!!!! And why Jack didn´t do it on his own :)  
> \- The "riding into the sunset" thing is stupidly stupid, but I wanted it there as a wink to how 15x19 ended xD
> 
> I feel that in the past seasons, Dean´s not been portrayed enamored of Cas, so it makes sense to me that there were things... but he didn't interpret them as love. Cause in his head he could not love romantically another guy. So this is all so fucking new to him. Thankfully for him, it´s been demonstrated more than enough that Cas´ love is nothing but patient :)  
>    
> PS- After waking Cas up and chatting with him, Jack immediately went to Sam to give him the same opportunity. When Dean and Cas return to the bunker, Eileen is already there ^^


End file.
